What the fuck were they thinking? What goes through the minds of people when they come back from the first day of their Marketing HND and go, 'boss, I've got this great idea'? Ilkley and the dales are to be re-branded as 'Baht'at Country'. We kid you not. You can sort of work out what they were thinking. 'Bronte Country has worked for Haworth, Herriott Country for wherever that is, Heartbeat Country for Goathland; surely Bahtat country will work for us?' Well, no, it won't. And a moment's thought would explain why. Here's what we learned at Branding 101. And what we didn't learn there, what we learnt from the good people at snarkhunting. First, don't jump on the bandwagon. The bandwagon has inevitably already jumped the shark. Just because tagging an area with 'country' has worked for a few places, doesn't mean it will work for you. This practice reeks of desperation. Especially when, for the first time, this country is named after a song. A song that no-one understands! Classy move that! Second, don't get confused about your market. The places with 'country' attached aren't real anymore, they have no class, they appeal to the lumpenproles and the foreigner wanting the 'England-in-an-easily-consumable-and-swallowable-globus' experience. They're all tea shops and sitcoms. Shit, there's even a summer wine country (and, oh, that's a place where I don't ever want to go). Ilkley and the Dales aren't like that. Sure, it's always been traditional for the place to be filled with the scum from Bradford come Bank Holiday, but that's okay as long as they're gone by nightfall. And why do they come? Because Ilkley offers them a short holiday in a better class of existence. Don't appeal to them, don't sell to them, or they won't be interested in coming. And thirdly and most bleedin obviously, bahtat country doesn't work because no-one can spell the fucking word. Anyone who's been to the wonderful Bar T'at knows that that phrase is almost impossible to spell first time. So you do a radio spot and declare 'come to visit baht'at country'. And everyone who hears it goes 'hunnh?'. Not to mention having to take six runs at the url. What IS the fucking point?